The Diva Threes

crown-toy-1427636-1919x1265We are now officially in what my husband has named “The Diva Threes”.  I swore prior to having children that I would not be jumping through hoops or acquiescing to my child’s every whim as some parents appeared to do.  My children were going to learn to be polite, to ask nicely, to compromise and to accept and be thankful for good things.  Hmmmmm. 

Somewhere between a lot (it has been A LOT) of sleep deprivation, life change, general chaos and I don’t know what I have somehow ended up spending huge proportions of my time and energy ensuring that what I do is up to the stringent standards of my 3 year old mini dictator.  I have now arrived at the place where I stand primed that as soon as the toaster pops out it’s warm crunchy offerings I leap to attention to ensure that the spread is on said toast (covered evenly all over) and then allowed to melt in before I cut it into four triangles to take to the boss for approval.  If the triangles are not “triangly” enough, the toast is not soft enough, warm enough, spread melted in enough etc etc I will receive a reprimand. How did we end up here????

waiter-1497281.jpgThese criteria also extend to other areas of life.  For example the bath must be an adequate depth or 3 year old will not enter the bath and we are left with the options of enforced dunking (no thank you) or smelly child (generally preferable to the former).  I am fully trained not to press play on the Frozen DVD until ALL of the pictures on the menu have appeared FULLY including Sven the reindeer (any fellow overfrozened parents will know what I’m talking about). 

I am in awe of how my beautiful, funny, affectionate and intelligent daughter has got us so well trained and how just how often I find myself doing things to make sure they meet her standards!  It amazes me in equal measure how a tiny event can evoke a massive meltdown from her and the depths of my desire for harmony at home.  Obviously that doesn’t mean that she gets her own way all the time – diva she may be at the moment, but I can’t do total brat. 

She is mostly polite, thankful, kind and helpful  and she will even compromise on some things.  It’s a good start for three years on the planet.  I am reminded that maybe what I expected at three vs the reality is just a  bit different.   Maybe it’s not so bad that on some issues I let her set the rules because on the big things she has to follow mine.  Perhaps letting her have her own way on somethings to avoid a meltdown isn’t going to create a monster after all…..


1 thought on “The Diva Threes”

  1. Good article Jules – guess it’s really about only ‘sweating the big stuff’ – although not literally! As with all things parenting related there are no right or wrong answers and every child is different. Helping them to know what the ‘bottom line’ is with things is key – and letting them ‘win’ sometimes in the smaller details is no bad thing – it shows that you love and value them – including some of their preferences and idiosyncrasies. After all, we’ve all got some of those – maybe as adults we just learn to hide them slightly better. Apart from Steve that is 😉


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